Appreciate you? For what, exactly?

So, my daughter has been in school for a whopping 3 weeks so far. When she came home yesterday she had with her a flyer touting the “Teacher and Staff Appreciation Breakfast” for Track 4. Now, I’m as appreciative for quality teachers as the next person. My issue here is…. THEY HAVEN’T DONE ANYTHING FOR ME TO APPRECIATE YET. I’m sure they’re lovely people, and I’m sure they’re awesome teachers. HOWEVER, why don’t you show me how awesome you are before ordering me to appreciate you? It’s three weeks into the school year, for god’s sake! I’ve been at my job for 6 weeks now and have YET to receive so much as an egg mcmuffin for my efforts!

Now, all this would have been aggravating enough (and it was, trust me), but as I read the flyer further, I found that I was being instructed exactly how I should “appreciate” the staff. Apparently, because my daughter is in kindergarten, my appreciation would best be shown by a breakfast casserole or quiche. Every other grade is permitted to show appreciation through store-bought items such as bagels, fruit, etc. But no… the group who has been here the shortest time (and therefore has the least to appreciate) is the group that is expected to put forth the most effort. It would seem that I am expected to be a stay at home mom (trust me, not in the cards, lol), because I’m expected to deliver a HOT dish…. in a disposable container. Perhaps someone smarter than myself could tell me how to drop off my daughter at my sister-in-law’s house at 7 (so I can go to WORK), and hhave this dish remain hot until almost 9, when she gets dropped off at school. The flyer went on to say I can pick up my dish any time between 3-5 PM in the teacher’s lounge. Well thats super convenient when I can’t even make it there to pick up my DAUGHTER until 6! I wonder if my boss would accept that as a reason for leaving early……. something to ponder.

Anyway, more than the logistics of the event, it’s the concept that has me irritated. Since when do we have to have special “appreciation” functions to pat people on the back for doing the job theyre being paid to do? When did everyone become so damn needy for recognition? Now, I know recognition feels good…. but wouldn’t it feel BETTER if it was spontaneous, as opposed to ordering someone to appreciate you on a specific day, at a specific time, and in a specific way?

Anyway, that’s my vent for today. Blowing it out of proportion? Quite possibly. But it’s my blog, and I’m allowed to.

My daughter’s descent into a life of crime…

So, as you are all aware, I have a 5 year old daughter who is amazing in most every way.  She is beautiful, social, smart as a whip, generally a very sweet kid.  In other words, she’s my spitting image.  I’ve been on my own with her long enough that I often forget that half of her DNA is, in fact, not from me.  Whether I like it or not, half of my beautiful daughter came from my less-than-desirable ex-husband.  Then she goes and does something like this…

Last Thursday, my sweet, angelic, daughter pulled her first con.  It was a cute one, as cons go… but a con nonetheless.  You see, Jasmine just recently started Kindergarten.  Along with her letters, numbers, and colors, she has discovered the joys of “buying lunch” in the cafeteria.  She and I have reached a deal where, as long as she is good and gets ‘greens’ every day for her behavior in class, she is allowed to buy lunch on Friday.  Well… she decided that Friday wasn’t soon enough this week (plus they were having mac and cheese in the cafeteria… which in and of itself *almost* makes this caper excuseable).  She was obviously determined to buy lunch on Thursday.

However, as a 5 year old with no income (and a full lunchbox), this was going to require some planning.  My favorite little criminal mastermind came up with her game plan.  She would eat her lunch at snack time, then play the sympathy card to the teacher when lunch time rolled around.  She executed the plan perfectly, and was rewarded by $1.75  in mal-obtained lunch money from the teacher for her efforts.  She purchased and devoured her tainted mac-and-cheese, and went on about the rest of the day as if nothing had happened.  She was completely and blissfully unaware of the slippery slope she had stepped on to, however innocently.

The nature of family

So, as most of you already know (assuming anyone even reads this), I recently have begun planning what will most likely end up being the most drastic move of my life.  Certainly, it’s the most drastic I’ve made to date.  In a few month’s time I will be selling most of my belongings (meager though they are), and shipping the rest of them (along with my daughter and I) from Raleigh, NC to Fairbanks, AK.  As I expected, I have received many different reactions to my decision.  These reactions have ranged from sheer excitement to unabashed anger.  Like I said, I expected as much… I know that this is not a move that most would even consider, much less agree to.  But then again, I’ve never really been much for living my life according to what others deem “appropriate”.  I LIKE the fact that I consider myself to be somewhat of a “black sheep”.  My life may end up being peppered with huge mistakes, but they will be MY mistakes… mine to make, and mine to learn from.

The reason for the title of this blog is because of the reactions that my family have had to this move.  I have always considered my family to be the best one in the world… something for other families to aspire to.  My family is very close (geographically and otherwise), and it’s something I’ve always been very grateful for.  That is, until now.  I have had family members express to me in the past few weeks that my move across country (across TWO countries, in truth) amounted to me being selfish and cutting my family from my life.  Given all the communication opportunities afforded to us these days, I find this to be quite a stretch.  I find it sad to think that my family would assume that because I live so far away, that I need to be “written off”, so to speak.  Why is it that none of my friends have had the same reaction?  Why do my friends seem to be the only ones who understand that geography has absolutely nothing to do with “closeness”? 

Let me be clear… I have every intention of remaining close, emotionally speaking, with my family.  They are, and will remain, the most important part of who I am today.  They are my roots.  Now it’s up to me to find my wings.